Fun with blogs on climate

seniorsI belong to a group of chemistry professors, physics professors, meteorologists, environmental consultants and engineers, some of us retired, some not. We commonly are placed in a strange category called “skeptics” or “deniers,” mostly by individuals who haven’t the brains to understand how real science is done. If you doubt this, look up the blog “HotWhopper.” It’s supposed to be, I guess, a “cone of shame,” when actually it’s the ultimate compliment. The most ignorant thing that one can say as a scientist is that “the science is settled.” As you may have guessed, we all are skeptical about man-made climate change. We still are looking for proof.

While perusing through Anthony Watts’ blog “Watt’s Up With That?” recently, I came across a section called Climate Craziness of the Week, a short, weekly discussion of various observations or predictions that supposedly are caused or will be caused by climate change. I’m sure Mr. Watts will not mind my sharing a few with you. The comments made about each are mine, and do not come from his blog. Perhaps these are the long-sought-after proofs of climate change.

Did you know senior citizens are a major cause of climate change? It must be because we old codgers drive our big cars around more, which seems to be counterintuitive, because aren’t most senior citizens retired? Now, I’m a big lobster lover, but apparently so are other lobsters. Climate change has turned on the cannibalism gene in lobsters. They have been eating each other at an alarming rate. And speaking of sea life, allegedly in 2014, there was a mass gathering of some 35,000 walruses, caused by, you guessed it, climate change. Makes sense to me. Why shouldn’t walruses have their own conference to discuss climate change, something that directly affects them?

A new study has shown that climate change is causing more people to cheat on their spouses. I’m not even going to touch that. I do know global warming is increasing warlike tendencies in humans. When was the last time you heard that a group of shivering-cold people, huddling together in some shack in the Arctic region, said, “Let’s go out and attack a neighboring village!” The answer would be, “Are you crazy? It’s 40 below outside!” I guess that is going to change as the Arctic warms.

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